Did she say “those 3 words”? Not, “I love you”…the other three words, “I am pregnant.” Who knew that 3 words could carry so many emotions and questions all at the same time. An unplanned pregnancy can leave you both feeling overwhelmed, scared, depressed, happy, excited, confused and upset all at the same time. Keep in mind that telling you may be one of the hardest things she has to do. She may be scared about your response or say she doesn’t care about what you think. Either way, she needs your support on what to do next. Each woman is different and faces this situation in her own way. She needs time and support to process the emotions she is going through. There are also a lot of changes that are already happening to her body. If she has chosen to include you, that means your support is extremely valuable to her. If you aren’t sure what she needs, ask her. This isn’t the time to try and guess or attempt to read her mind. Clear communication is key.
We understand that guys have many questions about what is going on as well. The number one question is always…”Are you sure?”
You may be looking for more information to help her, you, or both of you, on how to understand and handle this unexpected situation. Perhaps this is a great thing. Perhaps you only met up with her one night. Perhaps you have been together for a long time. Perhaps this is an inconvenient, unplanned thing that has your mind swirling. Whatever side you find yourself on, we are here to help with information and options.
Here are some thoughts for consideration that may help you through this:
- Check out the pregnancy symptoms list to see what some of the common symptoms are. Although this won’t diagnose the pregnancy, it can give you an indicator of what to look for and be aware of.
- Listen. The power of a listening ear as she thinks, reads, researches and processes through all of this is so important. She may want to talk or she might not want to talk at all. Read our article here for some helpful hints.
- Stability. Her body and hormones are changing. Her moods may swing. Her food cravings can be all over the map as well. That being said, be solid and steady. Whatever she needs and however she reacts in the moment, offer a patient, listening ear. It can help keep her calm as she is processing things.
- Educate yourself. There is a lot to know. Research and gather information with her as she is looking at options so that you are educated as well.
- Express your feelings. This isn’t the time to play tough guy. It’s the time to be real and have real conversations. Be open and willing to share how you truly feel about her without pressuring her into any certain outcome
- Support System. She has her tribe and you need your guys too. Find those mentors, friends, adults, and parents in your life that you can trust. Ask for their advice. Their perspective might be helpful as you support her and you both talk through your options.
First Thing’s First: Let’s confirm if she is pregnant. Then we can look to identify if the pregnancy is viable. We can help with the timeline and all the options. We are here to give you both the comprehensive and confidential care you need.
Lastly, Post Abortion Support: If the decision to terminate the pregnancy is made, our caring teams can offer you support as you process through that experience.
Reach out to us today and schedule your appointment with one of our advocates if you have questions. We also offer free pregnancy testing for her.